Freddie and me
I spend the weekend in Dorset with my mother and seven months pregnant sister. We are in the car and for some reason we are listening to Queen’s Greatest Hits. My sister and I are doing what we always do when we are in the car together, regressing to ages 8 and 6 and winding each other up.
‘You know, you’ve always reminded me of Freddie Mercury’ my sister says.
I narrow my eyes.
‘Who? Mum?
‘Noooo,’ she says. ‘You, of course.’
‘Why?’ I say. ‘Because I’m a fast-living homosexual who’s going to die young?’
‘Darling!’ my mother splutters.
My sister begins to sing along.
‘Tonight I'm gonna have myself a real good time
I feel alive and the world it's turning inside out Yeah!
I'm floating around in ecstasy
So don't stop me now don't stop me
'Cause I'm having a good time, having a good time
I'm a shooting star leaping through the skies
Like a tiger defying the laws of gravity
I'm a racing car passing by like Lady Godiva
I'm gonna go go go
There's no stopping me
I'm burning through the skies Yeah!
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit
I'm travelling at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic man of you
Don't stop me now I'm having such a good time
I'm having a ball don't stop me now
If you wanna have a good time just give me a call
Don't stop me now
Don't stop me now
I don't want to stop at all
I'm a rocket ship on my way to Mars
On a collision course
I’m a satellite
I'm out of control
I’m a sex machine ready to reload
Like an atom bomb about to
Oh oh oh oh oh explode
I'm burning through the skies
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit
I'm travelling at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic woman out of you
‘Are you saying I lack moderation?’ I enquire.
They laugh and sing louder.
I idly consider throwing myself out of the car.
I get my revenge later with Fat Bottomed Girls.
‘You know, you’ve always reminded me of Freddie Mercury’ my sister says.
I narrow my eyes.
‘Who? Mum?
‘Noooo,’ she says. ‘You, of course.’
‘Why?’ I say. ‘Because I’m a fast-living homosexual who’s going to die young?’
‘Darling!’ my mother splutters.
My sister begins to sing along.
‘Tonight I'm gonna have myself a real good time
I feel alive and the world it's turning inside out Yeah!
I'm floating around in ecstasy
So don't stop me now don't stop me
'Cause I'm having a good time, having a good time
I'm a shooting star leaping through the skies
Like a tiger defying the laws of gravity
I'm a racing car passing by like Lady Godiva
I'm gonna go go go
There's no stopping me
I'm burning through the skies Yeah!
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit
I'm travelling at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic man of you
Don't stop me now I'm having such a good time
I'm having a ball don't stop me now
If you wanna have a good time just give me a call
Don't stop me now
Don't stop me now
I don't want to stop at all
I'm a rocket ship on my way to Mars
On a collision course
I’m a satellite
I'm out of control
I’m a sex machine ready to reload
Like an atom bomb about to
Oh oh oh oh oh explode
I'm burning through the skies
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit
I'm travelling at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic woman out of you
‘Are you saying I lack moderation?’ I enquire.
They laugh and sing louder.
I idly consider throwing myself out of the car.
I get my revenge later with Fat Bottomed Girls.
posted by Lady V at 9:50 pm
5 Comments:
i'm sorry you're going to die young...
Well, young-ish. Maybe over thirty is already past it.
don't be silly, totty, you won't die young (er... besides, isn't young a little too late anyway at your age?); rather, you'll be one of those crazy old ladies - like Maude in Harold and Maude - who doesn't give an absolute toss about anyone and just causes major disruption and mayhem around her. and i'll have to run around apologising profusely...
Harold: What were you fighting for?
Maude: Oh, Big Issues. Liberty. Rights. Justice. Kings died, kingdoms fell. I don't regret the kingdom - what sense in borders and nations and patriotism? But I miss the kings
or queens in our case, eh totty.
snigger snigger chuckle. snort. giggle
honey...? do you think a post a week will satisfy our hunger, eh? I say, you can do better, totty...!
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